Understanding why we personalize: How to move away from guilt and blame

Many of us fall into the trap of personalization. This is a type of thinking pattern where we take responsibility and blame ourselves for something, irrespective of whether we had any control over the outcome. Consider the last time your partner was upset, your child had a meltdown, or your boss didn't give you a …

When you can’t logic your way out of feeling

Your way of coping with the world is to intellectualize. You use your logic to talk yourself out of feeling a certain way. You're able to stay away from the vulnerabilities inside by managing the situation with reason, problem solving, logic, and planning. Sounds pretty good, right? What could go wrong? Intellectualizing feelings often means …